Nine Things I Learned (or Had Reinforced) On Our Day Trip to Graz, Austria

1. Hungarians are Homicidal Maniacs

With me at the wheel of the mighty Opal again, Z, Vera and I made an early get away to Graz. Graz is about an hour-and-a-half to two hours, depending upon the traffic, road construction, etc. Along the way, I had opportunity, once again to admire the superb driving habits of my wife’s people. I had people pass me on blind corners, swerve into my lane directly in front of me to avoid a scooter in their lane, heck, swerve directly into my lane directly in front of me to get around a truck going the speed limit in their lane. I had pedestrians lunge directly in front of me without warning. I had cars pull directly in front of me without warning. And on and on.

Particularly worthy of a Darwin Award were the two individuals riding bicycles down a back road two abreast and not moving for anyone – even though the roads were very busy on this day. Most of us would figure out that this would be a swell time to make ourselves as small a target as possible. But not this brain trust.

The sad part of all of this is that I am somewhat used to it by now.

For your information, all this craziness stopped the minute we got into orderly Austria.

Welcome to Fürstenfeld!

2. Fürstenfeld is probably not worth longing for that much.

Our friends from Germany, die Original Donaumusikanten, cover this catchy little tune about longing to go home to the burg of Fürstenfeld. We drove though this little hamlet on our way. You enter town through these lovely fields, around one of the most attractive round-a-bouts I have seen in Europe – only to find that the rest of the town is basically a big outlet mall. With an Adult “Bookstore”on one end (those wacky Austrians!). I think strip malls are pretty universal, so if you miss Fürstenfeld, go to Woodburn, guys.

3. The closer you park to the tourist stuff, the more it will cost you

We parked in a garage near the inner ring in Graz – close to the Centrum, as the locals call it. It was a nicely short walk to all the nice views of the pretty downtown area. Our visit lasted 5 hours, and set us back 25 Euros (about 32 USD).

4. Graz is a happenin’ town for music

Of all the places we have visited, Graz has the most happenin’ musical culture. We got out of the car to the sound of a couple of people in the apartment building across the way practicing a violin sonata. We listened to several really excellent groups and individuals playing street music. The music was pop, classical, jazz, and, what can only be described as “other.”

I liked them just fine - until they started playing
Andrew Lloyd Webber.

This is all explained by the fact that Graz has a several superb schools of music, as well as numerous local and international music festivals. There is an American opera festival going on while we are in town. I have been told a couple of times that if you want to study jazz in Europe, you go to Graz.

The best of the street musicians was a trio of flute, violin and cello. The arrangements were creative, often making it sound like there were more of them than were actually playing. They moved through the downtown with us, following us through the day. I thought they were the greatest thing ever, up until the end of the day. Don’t you know they had to blow it and play Andrew Lloyd Webber. He, by the way, fits in the "Other" category.

5. Catch the Schlossberg

The Uhrturm - Clock Tower

Like all European cities, Graz has a beautiful, scenic downtown area/pedestrian mall. But you are fool in Graz if you don’t climb the 282 steps to the top of the Berg (or take the elevator or funicular for 1.7 Euros, if you must). Looking down on all of the cool old buildings is breathtaking. In addition to the great view of the rest of valley (check out the berg to the northwest on the side of the hill), you get to admire up close the Medieval Clock Tower (Uhrturm). For two Euros you can visit the inner workings, including the oldest bell in Europe. It was constructed in 1560, and still works great. Why doesn’t my wrist watch work as well? Cool factoid – the bell used to be only rung to announce executions, moving on to a much better life announcing the closing hours of bars.

If you are so inclined, there are many restaurants up here. Enjoy a beer and rest up from your climb! They have great views – nice places to contemplate the pretty architecture of the city, and to marvel why the fair citizens of Graz would want to screw it up by placing a huge snail in the middle of the river and a huge frog hulking on the banks.

Downtown Graz - complete with "Snail" and "Frog"

Look, I am a musician, composer, and fancy myself an artist (whatever that means – but we can go into that one later). I completely get that sometimes the objective of art is to “shock.” Contrast with surrounding materials is often the best way to do this. But the thing that makes it all work is that there is some thematic choices that tie it all together, Surely there must be a way to drop these new weird buildings into classic towns in such a way that they enhance the surrounding buildings – they borrow from what is going on around them – rather than just plopping a frog on the bank. It’s kind of like replacing the “B” section of the exposition of Beethoven 5 with “Walk This Way;” or even Beethoven 4. There is no motivic connection to the surrounding work – it doesn’t fit.

I also get that there is a section of the art community that feels like this is the point. It is not supposed to fit – contrast and all that. You are wrong. This is intellectual laziness on the part of the artist. Drop these weird buildings somewhere where they fit. Like Seattle.

All of this said, maybe there are a lot of snails and frogs in the Mur and, thematically, these are just the Mothership for them. Maybe I’m all wrong here. Nah…

6. Don’t Reform This Tort!

Sacher Tort and Viennese Milange -
A sugar high in the making!

If you like Sacher Tort – and what’s not to like – the best can be found at the Sacher Café, right off the central pedestrian walk. They invented the thing, so one assumes they know what they are doing. Moist chocolate cake covered in a rich chocolate ganache, with an avalanche of freshly made whip cream on the side. It is about 5.30 Euros (about $7.50 USD) for this little bit of decadence, but my is it worth it. We had ours with a Viennese Milange – half whipped crea, half espresso – and spent the rest of the day on a sugar high.

Enjoying a Puntigamer

7. Puntigamer Bier

For the beer bloggers, here is Graz’s entry – Puntigamer Pils. Z describes this is “Austria’s Hofbräu.” I think that is pretty generous. They say it is 5%, but I find this a little hard to believe. Pale golden brown, and a little thin in color, it is covered with a nice, foamy white head that hangs on through the whole glass and smiles at you when it is gone. It is a nice summer beer, a great balance of hops to malt, but not too big, and a nice, refreshing hop finish – a little kiss of bitter on the tongue. A lawnmower beer. This is not going to win any awards (although maybe it has), but it was just the thing on this hot day. I bet this stuff is great from mugs that are the size of your head. I know it was great with my lunch of grilled polenta cakes, topped with fresh tomato and goats cheese, accompanied by a green salad topped with pumpkin seed oil and herb vinaigrette.

Statue and fountain

8. Walk to the Front

The fountain and statue at the head of the pedestrian mall are particularly attractive. And I’m not just saying this because I was able to enjoy it for 45 minutes while Vera and Z were shopping at H&M. Kick your shoes off and cool your feet with the locals/tourists!

Actually, I’m surprised that it was only 45 minutes. There is lots of great shopping to be done in Graz. All of the big European chains have storefronts here, of course, but there are lots of really great specialty shops. The sheet music store, though small, was especially complete.

9. The Demise of C&A

I guess C&A is no longer the place to buy trachten. The quality of their folk clothing, and clothing in general, has fallen off extremely. Peter and Vera have both noticed that there are fewer things in their stores, and it is of lesser quality. Good thing Vögel of Switzerland is nearby! The new place to go for all you trachten needs!